Little Person

It's official - Eli is on his way to becoming a world traveler. Check out his new passport which is currently on its way to the Ghanaian Embassy in DC to get stamped with his visa (fingers crossed!). I think he wasn't so happy with his passport photo but thank goodness the children's passport is only good for 5 years so he'll get a new one soon enough.

And now that he has his identifying documents, Eli is starting to become his own little person complete with a temper at bath time and when hungry, all smiles in his swing, and a fiesty determination and strength during tummy time.





We're starting to differentiate these different moods while trying to figure out what makes this little boy tick. It's not easy though and sometimes I just look at him willing him to talk to me to tell me what his troubles are or what he thinks is so funny when he is seemingly staring and laughing at nothing. But to no avail, he has yet to fill me in so I will have to be patient and try to figure out the complex code of cries and facial expressions in an attempt to meet his every need. And this week, Eli's had a bit of a mild cold which has me on pins and needles every time he coughs or sounds congested because there's so little I can do to make him feel better and he seems so fragile still. But just when I've worked myself in a tisy over how uncomfortable he seems, he'll start cooing and "talking" and will give a little sly smirk and I then I realize he'll be just fine. His budding personality has got me so excited for the weeks and months to come when the little bundle of baby will start to become a little person.

A Lucky Man - By Alan

Two months before getting married I told my future-to-be-wife, “How about moving to Ghana for two years one month after getting married?” Emily could have slapped me in the face, sent me to hell, started crying thinking,” What have I done?”, or just called the wedding quits. She didn’t; she just said,”Let’s do it, I’ll go anywhere with you babe”.

Two weeks before departing we found out she was pregnant. Emily could have told me to stay, not go, be with her while she was pregnant. She didn’t; we figured out a schedule in such a way that I would visit my wife almost every other month – she was determined to make my new job work and have a baby at the same time.

After being six weeks pregnant, Emily had a miscarriage. It was extremely hard on her and her husband; I, was away on Ghana. She could have stayed in the US feeling sad, depressed, spending time with her parents. She didn’t; the minute she was fit for travel she got in a plane and flew 3,000 miles to be as soon as possible as close as possible to her husband.

When she arrived to Accra an empty 2,500 square feet condo awaited her. Our furniture was still in the high seas, I had just moved into the place from the hotel, and the only two pieces of furniture I had were a foam mattress in the bedroom floor and loaner couch from a fellow colleague which was uglier than Rossie O’donell in bikini. She could have lost it with me, complained about why her newly minted husband lived in substandard conditions with no furniture, or just jumped in a plane back to the US. She didn’t, instead she decided that while her husband worked, she would take care of the house, she was made sure all furniture needed was found, bought, and delivered… on-time, of good quality, and in line with our aesthetics concepts.

After some weeks, I hired a driver. The man could not speak English and did not know where anything was in Accra. He only had to take me to and from work, but needed to drive around Miss Wancier all over town. Additionally, the car given to us had a faulty A/C and at mid-day in Accra traffic it gets pretty hot and nasty. This was another reason to loose it – Emily even threatened to divorce me if I didn’t fix the A/C (see previous driving blog). She didn’t; instead she slowly taught our driver better English, she put in him school to learn how to read and write, and by trial and error, soon enough, after many wrong turns and tons of traffic and heat, they learned together where the things were and the best ways of getting there. She still hated me for the faulty A/C to which they resorted to opening windows.

Staying home for dinner can mean starvation for food snobs. As explained in the “eating out” blog, food is pretty simple in Ghana – this means local food as well as groceries to cook. Emily could have crossed her arms and gone out for dinner everyday after work. She didn’t; instead she spent half of the day everyday sitting in traffic, again, going to the four grocery stores we know looking for the perfect ingredients (each grocery store has different imports such as Shop Rite – South African, Maxsmart – English, Koala – Lebanese, Knights of Malta – Italian) so that she and her husband could enjoy a wonderful meal everyday after work.

So Emily furnished the apartment and found food to cook and we could have eaten great homemade bagels in our solid African wood table everyday of our stay in Accra looking at each other’s faces day in and day out. She didn’t. While I was working 10 hour days, she decided to make sure she had friends to hang out, and by default have friends for me too. After about 3 months in Accra, Emily was the best connected expat in the country and we had events and outings to attend to every weekend. Life started to be a bit more exiting.

I could continue on and on with this ode to my wife including here skills in baking, knitting, sewing, quilting, yoga, making pillows, organizing, socializing…, however will spare you the time, you get the point, my wife is simply amazing. The one thing I do have to mention is that we have been apart for about 6 months (exclude 1 month when I traveled to the US to presence the birth of my son – yes, we tried again and succeeded, she spent 6 months in Accra pregnant and went back to the US for the last three months) where I have enjoyed sleep, comfort, quietness, and solitude. Emily however, has had to endure uncomfortable pregnant nights and sleepless nights since Eli was born without a single complaint – 1.5 years married, 0.5 years separate. She is absolutely incredible and I just can’t wait for her to be back in Ghana with Eli – the next 6 weeks seem an eternity.

Nature Lover

This past weekend, my parents and I took Eli to our cabin in Asheville, North Carolina for a little get away and my sister-in-law, Missy, joined us with my nephew Gus. The grandparents got more bonding time with their newest grandson and Eli ate it up!


The trip provided some new "firsts" for Eli including his first road trip, his first diaper change in the car, and his first hike in the mountains in his carrier.

It was a lot of fun to experience these firsts with him and although he wasn't able to really appreciate the mountains, flowers in bloom, and the fresh crisp air yet, I found myself thinking ahead to a time when he's a little older and will love coming to the cabin where he'll be able to chase crickets through the grass, swim in the cool lake, and discover all the little creatures and plants up there.

We also had a lot of fun playing with Gus who is almost 1 now. He's doing all kinds of new tricks and is almost walking, has learned how to shake his head "no" and screams with excitement at the prospect of being fed.

The cousins seems to get along and Gus got a chance to give Eli some love pats while Eli remained mostly indifferent.


I tried to soak up the clean fresh air as it may be my last time there before heading back to Ghana in 6 weeks where fresh clean air is hard to come by.

Waking Up Is Hard To Do

One of my favorite parts of the day now is watching Eli wake up from a deep sleep which at this point happens quite often throughout the day. I had not been around babies much before Eli arrived so I've never experienced this special time before and am just amazed at not only how long it takes him to wake up but all the facial expressions and little grunts and movements he makes. I often have to laugh under my breath so as not to startle him from his sleep. It's almost impossible though as he smiles, then grimaces, then grunts, then stretches, then rolls his eyes back in his head all within seconds. I wonder what's going on in that little head of his and also whether all babies do this or if somehow this process is unique to our Eli. I like to think it's his "thing" but guess most babies do the same. I had to try to capture this moment on video since still photos cannot tell this story.

The Early Weeks

Eli was 3 weeks on Saturday and Alan and I are in awe of how fast he has already changed and developed since we brought him home. As exciting as all the new changes are, it also makes me realize (like everyone keeps warning me) how quickly he will grow and how soon these early days will be long gone, but definitely not forgotten.



We've been spending our days taking walks in the neighborhood with Eli both in his stroller and trying out our Baby Bjorn carrier, learning the best techniques for burping the boy who seems to have endless amounts of air in his tummy, and we even have taken him on a few outings - his first music concert, his first mall visit, and a trip to the botanical gardens.





Eli got to meet his cousin, Gus, two weekends ago and I think Gus was way more interested in Eli than Eli was in Gus but that will change I'm sure. It was really cute to see the cousins together and seeing Gus who is almost 1 and going through a teething phase but full of energy and playfulness was a great preview of what is to come!


Eli had his first professional photo shoot with my brother who captured amazing shots of Eli, Alan and me.
Here are a few of my favorites...




Speaking of photos, we've also begun to get ready to return to Ghana with Eli which has included getting his first passport pictures taken. We now realize that getting a 2 1/2 week old to lay flat, be awake, not crying and to stay still looking at the camera lens is virtually impossible. But after two passport photo locations and many many shots later, we managed to get a workable photo. The last few days included lots of father son bonding time between Eli and Alan, as Alan had to go back to Ghana today.


Eli and I will miss Alan tons but I can only imagine it will be harder for Alan to be away from us in Ghana. We have to be apart for 2 months during which Eli will change immensely but with the help of Skype, we hopefully won't feel so far away.